it's 4.42am

i know i know....
nobody will be talking to me in msn
nor will reply my messages..
except those who just came back from club...
like coreen n carol -.-
was on the phone with carol and just only got off the msn with coreen
carol's phone died off coz no battery...

i am currently digging out files from my un-arranged hard disk
just to arrange the files in it
movies to movies, with subfolder of legal and illegal :P
pictures with folders like events or 18sx pictures....
and songs...i dont know how to group it
and lots of repeat song with slight different title...
like...01.calle ocho and..calle ocho..without the 01.
eating up my hdd space
and no, cant listen 1 by 1
why? coz i got almost 23gb songs...


there...proven

and i have a lot of oldies sent by friends and downloaded
some songs reminds me of her
some songs reminds me of my childhood
some song brings me tear
some songs i totally forgot abt it
some songs are still remembered in my heart clearly
some songs i still can sing but some only can hum with it

trust me, i have malay songs, eng songs, indian songs, japanese songs, korean songs, some lotsa foreign songs that i dont understand at all, also instrumental songs
it's my song collection since i was eleven! eight freaking years!

i dont know why but i feel stressed out, emotional, suicidal...
i feel tense up whenever someone brings up the exam topic
i feel totally fucked up for this semester
sigh, if only i could turn back time

sometimes i just feel that the course i'm taking is not the course that i want
not something in my blood
it's somehow related to me, but in the cannot-make-it state
sometimes i will think back, why did i take this course?
i should've taken something which i like more
something more practical; culinary arts, electronics, stylist..

currently tuning to : rossa - aku bukan untukmu